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January 12, 2017

#thisis30: Engagement Season, GTFO!

When you're 30 and not engaged, "engagement season" seems to be more like groundhogs day... it's every season, all the time, everywhere. I close my eyes and just see a social feed of engagement rings, guys on one knee and strategic "candid" announcements.  I polled the snapchat and IG fam earlier this week and it seems like you gals are definitely feeling the pressure from engagement season too!

palm springs birthday party, engagement season, the amado palm springs
{snaps from my #pursuing30 bday}

Here's the thing, it's all a total mind f*ck. I personally had been feeling GREAT about my relationship until this holiday season at which point the following happened:

 So and so who've been dating for less than a year pop up on Facebook as "engaged" .... do you even KNOW that person? 

Then that couple who've been dating since high school ... thank god, it's about time

Then my brother's friend who I legit thought was STILL in high school.... don't do it, you're too young! 

At which point I told Andy: prep yourself for Christmas, the engagement questions are going to be coming hard and fast. And they did! We were cornered individually then bombarded together. How do you nicely tell your grandmother: LET. ME. LIVE?

palm springs birthday party, engagement season, the amado palm springs
{snaps from my #pursuing30 bday}

6 stages of not being engaged when everyone else and their mom is getting engaged:

1. Jealousy. Wait, I've been with my bf WAY longer than she has. Her ring is okay, but I want something totally different. (*starts pinning engagement rings*)

2.  Everyone get off my back! How long have you been together? Do you think you'll get engaged soon? Have you talked about it? What's your plan? How about everyone mind their own business? K. Thanks!

3. Reassessing ALL. THE. THINGS.  Does everyone else have a better relationships than I do? Maybe he's not my person? It's fine, it'll happen sooner or later. But, I like can't wait until later or I'm going to be 35. Then what if it doesn't happen and I have to start ALL over? 

4.  The awkward convo.  Not like you haven't had this conversation with him before but this time it's awkward AF because you're super emotional and worked up because you're having engagement FOMO.

5. Regret. Well, that was unproductive and now I just feel like a crazy person because we've already talked about a timeline and for some reason everyone else's timeline hijacked my heart and my brain. 

6. Over it! Engagement season, you're a total mind F*ck and I will not let you get into my head.

At the end of the day, only you and your boo know the timeline and what's right. Everything happens for a reason and I mean... #realtalk... Andy knows better than to propose to me in the winter time. 


  1. Girl, YES. As someone who's also 30 and in a relationship, you nailed this. (But seriously, who wants a winter proposal anyway?)

  2. LOL! I absolutely loved reading this post. Thank you so much for the comedy relief in this obnoxious time of engagements. P.s. We work out at the same studio! That's how I came about your website---The Studio MDR posted your photo and I was very curious as to what your Pursuit of Shoes was all about. I'm personally a huge fan of shoes ;) I am the co creator of the Gelometrics gloves in the studio---you may have seen them hidden behind the toesox and wags 😜

    1. Hi!! Aww thanks for your note. So OVER engagement season. LOVE me some studio MDR and I'll definitely check out the Gelometric gloves. Let's do a class together and drinks some time!!!

      - Ashley

  3. Never feel pressure, jealousy, or any of those things because I know do many people who married before or at 30 and are divorced. I know some who have the cute pictures on social media, but it's a mess behind closed doors. I would like to be married one day, but have never been in a rush for it or have pined away for it. Everything happens in its own time.

  4. Ash, I can relate! I am 31 and just got engaged September 2016. When it happens for you, you will marvel at the timing it happens and realize that it is perfect. Enjoy your relationship and brush off the pressuring and questions from others. It never goes away btw. Now they want to know when we are having babies and we're not even married yet! xo


Thank you for your lovely comments... Keep pursuing shoes!